So ANGRY at him, cant believe what he done!

I couldn't write this yesterday as I was so angry at him at least today I can write it down without wanting to explode!!!

Had a bad nights sleep, Violet decided to wake up and blow raspberries at 5.30am, just as Chris was comming home from work. I had to go to my aunts funeral later that morning so he had gotten a taxi straight home so he could get a few hours sleep before I left him with the 2 girls. Well she didnt want to go back to sleep, at about 6.30am she was wanting fed so I got her up and gave her a breastfeed, she then wanted some of her bottle. I put her back down in her cot and gave her her dummy, she was starting to settle but wanted my hand next to her face, she likes to cuddle into it while falling over so I stood by the cot holding her face, the next minute Chris is accusing me of trying to smoother her having my hand over her mouth! WTF! I was so pissed he could even think I could do such a thing so we had a major argument, I finally got Violet resettled to sleep about 7.30am, he then went to sleep and I started to get ready for the funeral.

I didnt want to go, I felt it too soon since my grandads funeral so had been upset all night thinking about him and going to the funeral, what I needed lastnight was someone to cuddle tell me it would be okay, not someone to accuse me of trying to hurt my baby! Anyways I got ready and woke him when I was leaving at 9.40am, I also said for him to feed Brogan.

I went to the funeral, it was really sad and I found it so hard to be there. I done a few bits of shopping after it and got home at 2pm. Brogan was out playing in the street, in the house he was asleep in bed, didn't look like he had moved in the slightest, Violet was in her cot and I could tell she needed changed as soon as I went into the room as it was stinking of poo! I put the shopping bags in the kitchen and checked the bottles, NOT ONE had been touched! Brogan came in then and told me that Violet had been crying earlier on but she didn't know how to make a bottle for her and Chris wouldn't get up to see to her and hadn't given her breakfast either.

I cannot believe he totally neglected the two of them while he slept, I got Violet changed and fed and made something for Brogan to eat, I then took the girls out a walk by the cannal, was a lovely day outside and I knew there was going to be an argument when I got home so wanted out for a while to try calm down.

His excuse was he was asleep as he had been working hard and never heard her, no offence but im alwas tired, I work hard everyday bringing up the girls and sorting out the house without any thanks and I can still watch them I would never EVER leave them hungry and dirty. He has tried to make it up the rest of the night but it going to take a long time till I ever trust him to watch them again after he done that. Words fail to explain how pissed off at him I am!