Me and Chris took Violet swimming for the first time today, she looked so cute in her little wetsuit and neoprene wrap to help keep her warm in the water. She seemed to really enjoy herself in the water although she didn't splash as much as she does in her bath at night but I think she was a little overwhelmed by the size of the pool.
I cant wait to take her back again soon, I am going to put her name down on the waiting list for swimming lessons, they should be fun to do together. I am going to do the same for Brogan, I used to take her when she was little until a had lewed and rude comments from a man who was there with his kids and partner regarding my large boobs, as I was already really self-concious about them I stopped going, its such a shame as she loves swimming as well, she getting signed up for lessons too.
Friday, 30 April 2010
Blood Results
I called the doctors today for my blood test results, they have apparently all came back normal, I know I should be happy but in a way im not because still I dont know why I feel so crap & why I keep putting on more and more weight.
I wish they had came back with a problem at least then I could sort it out some how but this way it still seems to others that I sit and do nothing but eat and get fatter when I dont, I eat well and exercise, I run after a 7 year old, a 4 1/2 month old baby & boyfriend, a dog & a house.
I am going to call on Tueday or Wednesday to get an appointment so I can talk to the doctor again as there has to be something wrong for me to have put on so much weight in so little time, Im nearly as heavy as I was at 9months pregnant!!!
I wish they had came back with a problem at least then I could sort it out some how but this way it still seems to others that I sit and do nothing but eat and get fatter when I dont, I eat well and exercise, I run after a 7 year old, a 4 1/2 month old baby & boyfriend, a dog & a house.
I am going to call on Tueday or Wednesday to get an appointment so I can talk to the doctor again as there has to be something wrong for me to have put on so much weight in so little time, Im nearly as heavy as I was at 9months pregnant!!!
Tuesday, 27 April 2010
Headstones & Alcohol
Been in a bit of a funny mood today, had a call earlier in the afternoon from my mum to let me know that my grandads headstone went up today. We all went to the graveyard to see it after I picked Brogan up from school, we had stopped on the way there so she could pick some daffodils to put at the grave. His stone is simple but lovely, I meant to take a picture of it but forgot so will go back tomorrow & take one. It made me realise how much I still miss him, he was such an important person in my life.
My mum also let me know my dad is really unwell again, they are divorced but still talk on a regular basis & get on better now, he is an alcoholic and he knows I no longer have sympathy for him when he ill if its to do with the drink. In Nov 08 he went into rehab, I was there visiting everyday, making sure he had anything he needed, then once he was out I visited everyday, helped him do his shopping everything only for him to repay me by going back on the booze, he had said yesterday he was at the doctors as well but nothing else, they are concerned over his liver function & sent him for blood tests, they also said that he will probably need to go back into hospital. I sat with him while he cried as the doctor told him on May '08 that if he never stopped drinking he would be dead within 12-18 months!!! Ok he still here, he was off the drink for about4-5 months & did cut down for a very long time as well, its a shame he cant stay off it for me, my sister & his granddaughters or most importantly himself.
My mum also let me know my dad is really unwell again, they are divorced but still talk on a regular basis & get on better now, he is an alcoholic and he knows I no longer have sympathy for him when he ill if its to do with the drink. In Nov 08 he went into rehab, I was there visiting everyday, making sure he had anything he needed, then once he was out I visited everyday, helped him do his shopping everything only for him to repay me by going back on the booze, he had said yesterday he was at the doctors as well but nothing else, they are concerned over his liver function & sent him for blood tests, they also said that he will probably need to go back into hospital. I sat with him while he cried as the doctor told him on May '08 that if he never stopped drinking he would be dead within 12-18 months!!! Ok he still here, he was off the drink for about4-5 months & did cut down for a very long time as well, its a shame he cant stay off it for me, my sister & his granddaughters or most importantly himself.
Monday, 26 April 2010
Weight Gain
Since I had Violet I have had weight problems, I quickly lost weight after she was born and within 2-3 weeks was at my pre-pregnancy weight. On 7th Feb I weighted myself and was 12 stone 4 pounds, still wanted to loose about 2 stones but was happy, had clothes that fitted and new it was coming off.
Well it all changed soon after that, until now I am weighting 13 stones 3 pounds, I was only 2 pounds heavier when I was 41 weeks pregnant (even then nearly 9lbs of that was Violet, then the placenta, water & all the extra weight from the blood & my uterus etc) it has gotten to the stage that now even my maternity clothes are too small. It does not matter what I eat or how much exercise I seem to do the weight just keeps going on and on!
I went to the doctors today as I am so stressed about my weight, when I told her about the weight gain she asked me loads of other questions on how I was feeling, like Im I always tired? Do I get cold easily? Have I had any troubles with the toilet? Swollen fingers/feet? Lack of interest in sex? Feeling depressed? there were a few more can't remember them all now! The answer to loads was YES! I am ALWAYS tired no matter how much sleep I get, I get cold really easily, I keep getting constipated, my fingers have been swollen & Ive had to move my rings to another finger but I just presumed it was due to the extra weight, my feet were ok, have no interest in sex I do it these days to keep Chris happy, I would happily not have it at all, there are days that I feel really depressed and down as well, where I dont want to get out of bed, when I cry at the slightest thing & have really terrible mood swings too.
The doctor thinks that due to all these things I may have an underactive thyroid gland, the thyroid gland is in the throat and produces hormones which help to regulate the bodys growth and metabolism. You can find more information on underactive thyroid problems at this link http://www.nhs.uk/Conditions/Thyroid-under-active/pages/introduction.aspx?url=pages/what-is-it.aspx an underactive thyroid is also known as hypothyroidism.
She sent me for some blood tests as that is the only way they can confirm any problems with the thyroid gland, I will get my results next week. I hope that it is a problem with my thyroid, I know that sounds strange but at least that way I know why I feel so crap and keep putting on weight, I hate people looking at me this big & I just know they think I sit at home & eat & do no exercise but it far from the truth, hopefully it is this and then I can get it controlled with medication and loose this weight!
I just hope the tests dont come back as normal as then I am back at square one and have no clue what is wrong with me.
Grrrr I hate being this heavy!
Well it all changed soon after that, until now I am weighting 13 stones 3 pounds, I was only 2 pounds heavier when I was 41 weeks pregnant (even then nearly 9lbs of that was Violet, then the placenta, water & all the extra weight from the blood & my uterus etc) it has gotten to the stage that now even my maternity clothes are too small. It does not matter what I eat or how much exercise I seem to do the weight just keeps going on and on!
I went to the doctors today as I am so stressed about my weight, when I told her about the weight gain she asked me loads of other questions on how I was feeling, like Im I always tired? Do I get cold easily? Have I had any troubles with the toilet? Swollen fingers/feet? Lack of interest in sex? Feeling depressed? there were a few more can't remember them all now! The answer to loads was YES! I am ALWAYS tired no matter how much sleep I get, I get cold really easily, I keep getting constipated, my fingers have been swollen & Ive had to move my rings to another finger but I just presumed it was due to the extra weight, my feet were ok, have no interest in sex I do it these days to keep Chris happy, I would happily not have it at all, there are days that I feel really depressed and down as well, where I dont want to get out of bed, when I cry at the slightest thing & have really terrible mood swings too.
The doctor thinks that due to all these things I may have an underactive thyroid gland, the thyroid gland is in the throat and produces hormones which help to regulate the bodys growth and metabolism. You can find more information on underactive thyroid problems at this link http://www.nhs.uk/Conditions/Thyroid-under-active/pages/introduction.aspx?url=pages/what-is-it.aspx an underactive thyroid is also known as hypothyroidism.
She sent me for some blood tests as that is the only way they can confirm any problems with the thyroid gland, I will get my results next week. I hope that it is a problem with my thyroid, I know that sounds strange but at least that way I know why I feel so crap and keep putting on weight, I hate people looking at me this big & I just know they think I sit at home & eat & do no exercise but it far from the truth, hopefully it is this and then I can get it controlled with medication and loose this weight!
I just hope the tests dont come back as normal as then I am back at square one and have no clue what is wrong with me.
Grrrr I hate being this heavy!
Saturday, 24 April 2010
My Breast Reduction Journey
I always had large boobs, it seems once they started to grow they never knew how to stop! My first bra was a 28AA, I was 11, I suppose I didn't really need it but wanted to get one as I was growing up. I remember going to get it from Mackays (M&Co) was so excited, if I knew then that 12 years down the line I would be squeezing them into a 32J I would have never believed you.
At 16 my boobs were lovely and pert in a size 34DD/E and I loved them, spent all my wages on new tops, I then fell pregnant at 17 and they grew to s size 34GG which I thought was HUGE, I didn't know then a few years after that I would consider that small!!!
I first started on my journey to a breast reduction in 2006, it was then at a size 34F I had decided I had enough and asked my GP for a referral for a reduction, she took some measurements and sent my referral off for me. I didn't come to this decision lightly, it took me a long time after loads of research to decide that the only way I would ever feel better about my boobs (as well as reducing the back pain and constant embarassement of people learing at them & men trying to grab them when out), I dispised my boobs and would have been happy to have none.
After my referral I thought it wouldn't take long to been seen and get a yes or no on the surgery but I was so wrong, My referral was sent off in July 2006, it me until 21st August 2007 to finally get an appointment to see a Plastic Surgeon, a Mr Stephen Morley, on the NHS, he looked at my boobs, asked me why I wanted the surgery and took my measurement and said I could go on to the waiing list for surgery BUT I had to have a Clinical Psychology assessment first so would send me to see them then put me on the list as it was protocol for the PCT to have a psych assessment done for the surgery & that I should have had one done before seeing him. At that appointment I was wearing a 34G bra, was 164cm and 69Kg at this time. I was also suffering from Fibrocystic Breast Condition.
Fibrocystic Breast Condition is where your breast become painful and lumpy, they often have non-cancerous cyst growths and the condition can be exaspereated by hormones and caffine in you diet. In my case it made them incredibly painful to touch as well as lumpy, it also caused me to have 3 seperate breast cancer scares and I had to take painkillers on a daily basis to help cope with the pain.
I was advised of a 13 month waiting list to see the psychologist after this appointment, it felt like a kick in the guts, to be told I would have to wait that long to be seen, I thought it would be quicker, guidelines say no more than 18 weeks from referral to appointment but apparently clinical psychology does not fall in these guidelines. I finally got an appointment for my psych assessment sooner than this (think the fact I was constantly badgering them on the phone, email and letters helped) for the 20th June 2008 with Dr Clifford. Was so happy when my appointment came in I could have chased down the postman & kissed him. My appointment went well, we talked over my feelings towards my boob and why I wanted the surgery and 2 weeks after the consultation she called to tell me I was being recommended for surgery but had to go back to see the plastic surgeon, I knew he had already said yes so wasn't too worried was nearing the end of my journey I thought!
It took until the 11th November 2008 to see the plastic surgeon again, he went over the operation again with me and said I could be listed for surgery, was so happy that day. There was a maximum waiting list of 16 weeks so I was hoping to be rid of my boobs before I turned 24. I recieved a letter in January 2008 to say that as the surgeons I was seeing had long waiting list and Breast Reduction was not his speciallity they were transferring me to see another surgeon! I had to go and see my new surgeon, Miss Elizabeth Whallet on 22nd January 2009 before I could be listed for my surgery, was nervous again as now my BMI was over the limit of 28 and scared she would say no.
I need not have been worried Miss Whallet was lovely, made me feel really at ease, I liked her as soon as I met her, she was quirlky but so nice and made me feel so relaxed. At the appointment she took all me measurements, my bra size was a 32J, my N2N (notch to nipple) measurements were: Left:32cm and Right 35cm (normal measurements are: between 19-25cm) my under mammory fold measurements (from nipple to crease/fold underneath) was Left: 14cm Right:15cm and I weighed 78Kg. I had my pre-op photos taken at this appointment and as I was happy with her to continue with my surgery was told it would be done within 6-8 weeks. I left that appointment looking like a cheshire cat, I had the biggest grin on my face you could ever imagine.
On the 30th January 2009 I recieved a call from Miss Whallets secretary advising me of my surgery date, I was to be admitted to hospital on the 12th March 2009 and would have my sugery on the 13th March 2009, I was in work when I took the call and was on cloud 9 for the rest of the day, after so long I could not believe I finally had my surgery date. I had to go into the hospital on the 19th February for my pre-op assessment.
My pre-op went well, they took some blood tests, my bp, height, weight and a background medical history, I was now all set for my surgery.
I was admitted on 12th March at 1pm for my surgery the following day, later that afternoon my plastic surgeon came round to see me on the ward and marked me up for my surgery, my chest was covered in black marker! I barely slept that night due to the excitement. On the 13th March 2009 at 7am I was taken down to theatre, Miss Whallet came and done my final marking up and at 8.30am I was wheeled into theatre to have my longed for surgery. It took 5.5 hours and I had 975g removed from the left side and 1025g removed from the right side, I also lost 1.5 pints of blood during the surgery and became anaemic. I remember comming around from the surgery and asking if my boobs were small, I drifted in and out for a while then I noticed on the wall clock it was 3.10pm and was adament that I was going back upto the ward as I knew Chris would be there waiting & I wanted to see him, they wanted to keep me in recovery longer but I insisted they move me or I was walking, I would have loved to have seen me try still half asleep from the anaesthetic, on a drip and doped up on morphine. Was so pleased when they took me up to see him, even if it was only for 15 mins before visiting was over and he had to leave.
That evening Chris, my mum and David came to visit me where I puked all over the place thanks to the General Anaesthetic and morphine, I couldn't wait to show off my boobs. On the sunday I had my drains removed and was discharged home to recover. My boobs were in a 34D sports bra that was still a little too big for me even with all the swelling in my boobs, they were also black, blue and purple with major bruising all over. My healing was to begin, once the swelling had went down I was looking forward to wearing a 34C bra and lovely tops. I never got the chance to enjoy my new boobs as little did we all know at the time of the surgery there were cells dividing in me, these cells were Violet, on the 8th March we had sex and the condom had split but I was not on the pill due to my surgery and couldn't take the morning after pill either for the same reason, NEVER thought that it would end with me being pregnant but it did and I found out she was going to be coming on the 27th March, 6 days after my period was due. She was a little fighter to stay with us after the trauma my body suffered in the surgery and the mediacation and blood loss too, she is here for a reason & that reason is to love her. As much as having her so soon meant my boobs never got a change to heal properly and for me to enjoy them I would not change her arrival for anything.
My boobs healed with only one little open spot on the t-junction when healing an I even managed to breast feed Violet when she finally arrived even after the trauma they suffered and the 50:50 chance I had of being able to which was reduced again as it was so soon after the surgery. Unfortunately the pregnancy and breast feeding effected my boobs, they are no longer the 34C boobs I was expected but have yet again grown into a 34F! Back where I started from in 2006 but this time im no longer the slim 69Kg I was then Im struggling with ever increasing weight gain (it goes on no matter what & I dont know why!) and at 83Kg I am now heavier than what I was at 9 months pregnant with Violet! I suppose I should go to the doctors make sure everything okay with me & fingers crossed the bra size will go back down! But if it does not I would happily go through it all again, Im still not discharged from plastic and go back for my final appointment in September so if they done hopefully they will do it again & I wont need to wait as long this time around.
I had my surgery performed at Canniesburn Plastic Surgery Unit, Glasgow Royal Infirmary, Glasgow but Miss Elizabeth Whallet.
At 16 my boobs were lovely and pert in a size 34DD/E and I loved them, spent all my wages on new tops, I then fell pregnant at 17 and they grew to s size 34GG which I thought was HUGE, I didn't know then a few years after that I would consider that small!!!
I first started on my journey to a breast reduction in 2006, it was then at a size 34F I had decided I had enough and asked my GP for a referral for a reduction, she took some measurements and sent my referral off for me. I didn't come to this decision lightly, it took me a long time after loads of research to decide that the only way I would ever feel better about my boobs (as well as reducing the back pain and constant embarassement of people learing at them & men trying to grab them when out), I dispised my boobs and would have been happy to have none.
After my referral I thought it wouldn't take long to been seen and get a yes or no on the surgery but I was so wrong, My referral was sent off in July 2006, it me until 21st August 2007 to finally get an appointment to see a Plastic Surgeon, a Mr Stephen Morley, on the NHS, he looked at my boobs, asked me why I wanted the surgery and took my measurement and said I could go on to the waiing list for surgery BUT I had to have a Clinical Psychology assessment first so would send me to see them then put me on the list as it was protocol for the PCT to have a psych assessment done for the surgery & that I should have had one done before seeing him. At that appointment I was wearing a 34G bra, was 164cm and 69Kg at this time. I was also suffering from Fibrocystic Breast Condition.
Fibrocystic Breast Condition is where your breast become painful and lumpy, they often have non-cancerous cyst growths and the condition can be exaspereated by hormones and caffine in you diet. In my case it made them incredibly painful to touch as well as lumpy, it also caused me to have 3 seperate breast cancer scares and I had to take painkillers on a daily basis to help cope with the pain.
I was advised of a 13 month waiting list to see the psychologist after this appointment, it felt like a kick in the guts, to be told I would have to wait that long to be seen, I thought it would be quicker, guidelines say no more than 18 weeks from referral to appointment but apparently clinical psychology does not fall in these guidelines. I finally got an appointment for my psych assessment sooner than this (think the fact I was constantly badgering them on the phone, email and letters helped) for the 20th June 2008 with Dr Clifford. Was so happy when my appointment came in I could have chased down the postman & kissed him. My appointment went well, we talked over my feelings towards my boob and why I wanted the surgery and 2 weeks after the consultation she called to tell me I was being recommended for surgery but had to go back to see the plastic surgeon, I knew he had already said yes so wasn't too worried was nearing the end of my journey I thought!
It took until the 11th November 2008 to see the plastic surgeon again, he went over the operation again with me and said I could be listed for surgery, was so happy that day. There was a maximum waiting list of 16 weeks so I was hoping to be rid of my boobs before I turned 24. I recieved a letter in January 2008 to say that as the surgeons I was seeing had long waiting list and Breast Reduction was not his speciallity they were transferring me to see another surgeon! I had to go and see my new surgeon, Miss Elizabeth Whallet on 22nd January 2009 before I could be listed for my surgery, was nervous again as now my BMI was over the limit of 28 and scared she would say no.
I need not have been worried Miss Whallet was lovely, made me feel really at ease, I liked her as soon as I met her, she was quirlky but so nice and made me feel so relaxed. At the appointment she took all me measurements, my bra size was a 32J, my N2N (notch to nipple) measurements were: Left:32cm and Right 35cm (normal measurements are: between 19-25cm) my under mammory fold measurements (from nipple to crease/fold underneath) was Left: 14cm Right:15cm and I weighed 78Kg. I had my pre-op photos taken at this appointment and as I was happy with her to continue with my surgery was told it would be done within 6-8 weeks. I left that appointment looking like a cheshire cat, I had the biggest grin on my face you could ever imagine.
On the 30th January 2009 I recieved a call from Miss Whallets secretary advising me of my surgery date, I was to be admitted to hospital on the 12th March 2009 and would have my sugery on the 13th March 2009, I was in work when I took the call and was on cloud 9 for the rest of the day, after so long I could not believe I finally had my surgery date. I had to go into the hospital on the 19th February for my pre-op assessment.
My pre-op went well, they took some blood tests, my bp, height, weight and a background medical history, I was now all set for my surgery.
I was admitted on 12th March at 1pm for my surgery the following day, later that afternoon my plastic surgeon came round to see me on the ward and marked me up for my surgery, my chest was covered in black marker! I barely slept that night due to the excitement. On the 13th March 2009 at 7am I was taken down to theatre, Miss Whallet came and done my final marking up and at 8.30am I was wheeled into theatre to have my longed for surgery. It took 5.5 hours and I had 975g removed from the left side and 1025g removed from the right side, I also lost 1.5 pints of blood during the surgery and became anaemic. I remember comming around from the surgery and asking if my boobs were small, I drifted in and out for a while then I noticed on the wall clock it was 3.10pm and was adament that I was going back upto the ward as I knew Chris would be there waiting & I wanted to see him, they wanted to keep me in recovery longer but I insisted they move me or I was walking, I would have loved to have seen me try still half asleep from the anaesthetic, on a drip and doped up on morphine. Was so pleased when they took me up to see him, even if it was only for 15 mins before visiting was over and he had to leave.
That evening Chris, my mum and David came to visit me where I puked all over the place thanks to the General Anaesthetic and morphine, I couldn't wait to show off my boobs. On the sunday I had my drains removed and was discharged home to recover. My boobs were in a 34D sports bra that was still a little too big for me even with all the swelling in my boobs, they were also black, blue and purple with major bruising all over. My healing was to begin, once the swelling had went down I was looking forward to wearing a 34C bra and lovely tops. I never got the chance to enjoy my new boobs as little did we all know at the time of the surgery there were cells dividing in me, these cells were Violet, on the 8th March we had sex and the condom had split but I was not on the pill due to my surgery and couldn't take the morning after pill either for the same reason, NEVER thought that it would end with me being pregnant but it did and I found out she was going to be coming on the 27th March, 6 days after my period was due. She was a little fighter to stay with us after the trauma my body suffered in the surgery and the mediacation and blood loss too, she is here for a reason & that reason is to love her. As much as having her so soon meant my boobs never got a change to heal properly and for me to enjoy them I would not change her arrival for anything.
My boobs healed with only one little open spot on the t-junction when healing an I even managed to breast feed Violet when she finally arrived even after the trauma they suffered and the 50:50 chance I had of being able to which was reduced again as it was so soon after the surgery. Unfortunately the pregnancy and breast feeding effected my boobs, they are no longer the 34C boobs I was expected but have yet again grown into a 34F! Back where I started from in 2006 but this time im no longer the slim 69Kg I was then Im struggling with ever increasing weight gain (it goes on no matter what & I dont know why!) and at 83Kg I am now heavier than what I was at 9 months pregnant with Violet! I suppose I should go to the doctors make sure everything okay with me & fingers crossed the bra size will go back down! But if it does not I would happily go through it all again, Im still not discharged from plastic and go back for my final appointment in September so if they done hopefully they will do it again & I wont need to wait as long this time around.
I had my surgery performed at Canniesburn Plastic Surgery Unit, Glasgow Royal Infirmary, Glasgow but Miss Elizabeth Whallet.
Thursday, 22 April 2010
Sad news from my sister and weaning fayre
After my strange answer messages from the dead yesterday I had another blast from the past last night. My mum had a friend when I was younger who happened to have the same birthday as me & I used to call her my twin. When I was about 12 or 13 she moved away and never got in touch again, no forwarding address, nothing. Me and my mum were rather upset, so was my younger sister as she played and was really good friends with her daughter. My mum had posted a message on friends reunited and managed to get there address where they stay now. After about 12 or 13 years of not hearing from them, heard about the baby she had after leaving (was 7 months pregnant when she left) and another she had after that but never from them to know where she stays seems so strange, my mum is planning on writing to her, no pressure on her to get in contact back but just to get in contact let her know about what has been happening here since they left.
My mum also told me she had finally gotten in contact with my younger sister, we had not heard from her since 15th March after my grandads funeral. She had went on a "missing" list! My sister is a drug addict, she had a daughter, my niece, Hayley who is 5 and stays with my mum as she is not fit to look after and care for her. It's not unusual for my sister to dissapear for days and weeks on end, she has always been a rather selfish person in that respect, she is 21 yet acts like a small spoilt child.
My sister had been in hospital in the time she hadn't been in contact, she was in as she had an ectopic pregnancy, that is a pregnancy where the embryo grows outside the womb, in my sisters case it was on one of her fallopian tubes, thankfully she never lost her tube and is okay, as much as loosing a baby is such a horrible thing to happen (this is her second miscarridge) due too the state of her life it also seems like it is a blessing in disguise. I may sound terrible for saying this but she is addicted to Heroin and Cocaine she also smoke Cannibis, she has no home of her own either, her life is a total mess, we have all tried to help her but until she can help herself there is not much we can do for her. As I've said she as a daughter that has been in my mums care for the past 3 years, before that my mum stayed with her for a while or she used to go stay with my mum so never really had her on her own every anyways so doesn't have a clue about how to bring her up. She couldn't tell you how she is getting on at school, what is her favorite DVD, book or toy, who her friends are, nothing!!! The last thing my sister needs in her life is to bring another one into it, for if she did who would look after her baby, how would she feel knowing she would have made the baby who is an inoccent little person have to go through horrendus withdrawals once born due to her addiction as well.
While she was in the hospital she also had them look at her kidneys, she has had problems with them in the past when she was younger and had been having problems with them again. They have said she has totally wrecked her kidneys, she has to go into hospital on the 4th May to have surgery, this is to remove dead and damaged tissue surrounding them and to assess the total amount of damage to them. They are also planning to place a balloon into her kidneys, not sure as to why completely but the procedure will leave her in hospital for between 1-3 weeks depending on how well she reponds to the treatment. If it doesn't work she will have to go into another hospital that specialises in renal surgery. I worry for her but still cant get past thinking she brought alot of this upon herself.
I had my weaning fayre today, I found some parts of it useful and others totally useless. They advised the same as WHO guidelines that babies should be exclusively breast or formula fed till 6 months before introducing solid foods but said that the UK government also says that as every baby different they may need it sooner but no earlier than 17 weeks. There talk and demonstration was about perfect weaning foods, how jars and baby foods quite often were ladden with sugar and to try limit the amout of sugar that is in a babies diet and also that maing your own is not onl better but also cheaper as well. When I asked them about BLW (that is Baby Led Weaning) they said that it is not reccomended as babies insides were not designed to go straight from milk only to solids and that they had to have purees, I dont believe this and hopefully will do BLW with Violet as I think it is a way of weaning that would suit us better. They reccomended purees until 7-8 months then slowly introducing lumpier foods and no finger foods until at least 10 months to reduce risk of choking. Babies rarely choke but rather gag, they have an excellent gagging reflex and if leant forward can easily gag up food they have not managed to swallow. I will take there advice with a so called pinch of salt and do what feels best for us. On the upside we did get some lovely recipies and freebies.
My mum also told me she had finally gotten in contact with my younger sister, we had not heard from her since 15th March after my grandads funeral. She had went on a "missing" list! My sister is a drug addict, she had a daughter, my niece, Hayley who is 5 and stays with my mum as she is not fit to look after and care for her. It's not unusual for my sister to dissapear for days and weeks on end, she has always been a rather selfish person in that respect, she is 21 yet acts like a small spoilt child.
My sister had been in hospital in the time she hadn't been in contact, she was in as she had an ectopic pregnancy, that is a pregnancy where the embryo grows outside the womb, in my sisters case it was on one of her fallopian tubes, thankfully she never lost her tube and is okay, as much as loosing a baby is such a horrible thing to happen (this is her second miscarridge) due too the state of her life it also seems like it is a blessing in disguise. I may sound terrible for saying this but she is addicted to Heroin and Cocaine she also smoke Cannibis, she has no home of her own either, her life is a total mess, we have all tried to help her but until she can help herself there is not much we can do for her. As I've said she as a daughter that has been in my mums care for the past 3 years, before that my mum stayed with her for a while or she used to go stay with my mum so never really had her on her own every anyways so doesn't have a clue about how to bring her up. She couldn't tell you how she is getting on at school, what is her favorite DVD, book or toy, who her friends are, nothing!!! The last thing my sister needs in her life is to bring another one into it, for if she did who would look after her baby, how would she feel knowing she would have made the baby who is an inoccent little person have to go through horrendus withdrawals once born due to her addiction as well.
While she was in the hospital she also had them look at her kidneys, she has had problems with them in the past when she was younger and had been having problems with them again. They have said she has totally wrecked her kidneys, she has to go into hospital on the 4th May to have surgery, this is to remove dead and damaged tissue surrounding them and to assess the total amount of damage to them. They are also planning to place a balloon into her kidneys, not sure as to why completely but the procedure will leave her in hospital for between 1-3 weeks depending on how well she reponds to the treatment. If it doesn't work she will have to go into another hospital that specialises in renal surgery. I worry for her but still cant get past thinking she brought alot of this upon herself.
I had my weaning fayre today, I found some parts of it useful and others totally useless. They advised the same as WHO guidelines that babies should be exclusively breast or formula fed till 6 months before introducing solid foods but said that the UK government also says that as every baby different they may need it sooner but no earlier than 17 weeks. There talk and demonstration was about perfect weaning foods, how jars and baby foods quite often were ladden with sugar and to try limit the amout of sugar that is in a babies diet and also that maing your own is not onl better but also cheaper as well. When I asked them about BLW (that is Baby Led Weaning) they said that it is not reccomended as babies insides were not designed to go straight from milk only to solids and that they had to have purees, I dont believe this and hopefully will do BLW with Violet as I think it is a way of weaning that would suit us better. They reccomended purees until 7-8 months then slowly introducing lumpier foods and no finger foods until at least 10 months to reduce risk of choking. Babies rarely choke but rather gag, they have an excellent gagging reflex and if leant forward can easily gag up food they have not managed to swallow. I will take there advice with a so called pinch of salt and do what feels best for us. On the upside we did get some lovely recipies and freebies.
Wednesday, 21 April 2010
Calls from the dead . . .
Today has been a bit of a strange day, I decided to check and clear my voicemails from my phone as it was blinking full, I barely use it so was surprised it was full, then again I never check for calls or messages so why should I have been! Anyways, first few were those stupid machines that drive you crazy saying you have won something or trying to sell you something, then there was a random message which if I hadn't hit delete would have listened to again which I'm sure was my ex's voice shouting "big tits" then laughing in the background from him and his girlfriend, the next message was from my gran, she was going on in it about checked summer dresses for school and that she didn't know to buy a 3-4 or 4-5 age (message must have been from 2 years ago as Brogan now 7, shows how often I listen to them!) she then goes in it and asks my grandad how much they cost and you can hear him say "they were £3", I know it sounds mad but it got me really upset as I miss him so much since he died last month and it felt so strange to hear his voice, not his sick voice either that he eventually got but his proper voice! A few messages on there was one from my mum, this was another strange message she was saying in it that she was going to a hospital appointment with David (her partner) and should be home by 3 but not to worry if she wasn't as Sean was in the house, Sean was my step-brother who died last March, another call from the dead!!! Ok I never heard his voice but to know when it was made he was there & still alive, makes me feel strange.
Needless to say since I listened to those messages I have been in a weird mood and have listened to them about 20 times since, its nice to hear my grandad talking and nice to hear a time from when Sean was alive as well.
This evening we took Violet to Chris's parents house for a while to see them, we left her there and went to Glasgow Fort to take a nosey around for a while, when we got back Chris's mum happily told us that she had fed Violet mash potato! I never said anyhting and haven't yet to Chris but I'm FURIOUS, she is not even being weaned yet, yes me & Chris have tried her with a few foods but were her parents and as much as we think a little try of foods just now is ok we dont want her on solids just yet as she not completely ready for them. I dont even know if she put anything in them (such as milk or butter) or if she cooks with salt (most people do without realising that you can't cook with salt if giving it to a baby as it is dangerous to them), she said she gave her a few spoonfuls and she ate them all!!!! We NEVER have given her a few spoonfuls of anything only little tastes from what we are eating, I can safely say I wont be leaving her there with them for a while, I'm so pissed off about it that I know it will only cause an argument (that I cant be bothered with) if I say just now so will need to bite my tongue till tomorrow maye then I will have calmed down about it so can be more rational but I doubt it!
On another note about weaning, I have an appointment tomorrow for a weaning fayre with Violet and really looking forward to it so that I can get recipie ideas for her for when I do start to wean her.
Needless to say since I listened to those messages I have been in a weird mood and have listened to them about 20 times since, its nice to hear my grandad talking and nice to hear a time from when Sean was alive as well.
This evening we took Violet to Chris's parents house for a while to see them, we left her there and went to Glasgow Fort to take a nosey around for a while, when we got back Chris's mum happily told us that she had fed Violet mash potato! I never said anyhting and haven't yet to Chris but I'm FURIOUS, she is not even being weaned yet, yes me & Chris have tried her with a few foods but were her parents and as much as we think a little try of foods just now is ok we dont want her on solids just yet as she not completely ready for them. I dont even know if she put anything in them (such as milk or butter) or if she cooks with salt (most people do without realising that you can't cook with salt if giving it to a baby as it is dangerous to them), she said she gave her a few spoonfuls and she ate them all!!!! We NEVER have given her a few spoonfuls of anything only little tastes from what we are eating, I can safely say I wont be leaving her there with them for a while, I'm so pissed off about it that I know it will only cause an argument (that I cant be bothered with) if I say just now so will need to bite my tongue till tomorrow maye then I will have calmed down about it so can be more rational but I doubt it!
On another note about weaning, I have an appointment tomorrow for a weaning fayre with Violet and really looking forward to it so that I can get recipie ideas for her for when I do start to wean her.
Monday, 19 April 2010
Busy Mondays & Brogan Hearing test
The schools went back today after the easter holidays, thankfully! But after saying to Brogan all day Sunday to make sure she knew where her shoes & school bag were she came into the living room at 8.15am just as we were getting ready to leave to inform me she can only find 1 shoe!!! You take 2 off, at the sametime so WHY are they not left in the same place & WHY didnt you make sure you knew where they were when I asked you? Grrrrr Couldnt find them either so had to let her wear her trainers to school, suppose its better than bright pink doc martens with bright yellow laces, the girl has a style of her own!
I was SO tired today, Id went to bed at midnight thinking I would get a decent sleep ready to get up early take Brogan to school, oh how wrong was I? Violet decided to wake at 3.30am till 4.30am then 5am till 6am, I then had to get up at 7.30am to get Brogan ready for school, could have cried when the alarm went off, it also woke little madam up as well! Just glad she later went to sleep for 2 hours so I managed to sleep then, so much for starting to catch up on my housework!
Brogan had her hearing test today, it went ok, she passed the test with some hearing loss at low frequencies but that (in theory) shouldn't effect her hearing at speach levels as they were ok, her ears were clear of fluid and wax as well, she didnt seem to rely to heavily on word recognition patterns when being spoke to either, looks like she needs to start to listen more than anything else. She sis say that somedays she an hear fine where others she finds it hard so we have to go back in a few months time to get checked over again. She likes to keep me on my toes with her hearing, she done the samething when she was a baby, passed her newborn hearing screening but failed her hearing test at her 6 week check so had to go back and forth then to audiology appointments, they came back fine then as well, she just likes to ignore people I think!!!!
Me and Brogan done some shopping before we headed home, once in I quickly put the shopping away while instructing her to change into her dance uniform as she has dance class on a Monday evening which starts at 4.45pm, took us ages to drive there as there is stupid roadworks, she got dropped off, then I went home to make dinner before I had to pick her up again at 6.30pm. When we were eating dinner I put some brocolli and cauliflower on Violet's highchair for her to try, she never even attempted to pick it up to eat but played with the blue bowl, apparently it was more interesting, I did put a few pieces in her mouth to see how she got on, seemed to like the brocolli but kept spitting the cauliflower out as soon as I put it in her mouth, dont blame her I dont really like it either, only eat it as it good for you (& helps to my 1 of 5 per day which I rarely manage to get to!) As much as she watches everything you eat & puts loads in her mouth (the socks went in at dinner time, haven't a clue how she got it off, into her hand & up to her mouth while in her highchair, a wee mini houldini I think!) she isn't ready yet to be weaned. She is 18weeks and 4 days today so still plenty of time yet to wean her, she was sort of sleeping through (until the past 2 nights) and is happy on her milk so leaving her just now for a while longer, might let her try little bits every so often so I can judge when she ready.
Got a lot to do tomorrow morning, need to take my gran to the local housing office, her & my grandad live in a council house, the tenancy was under his name so since he has died it needs to be transfered to her name now, loads of stupid forms and now this interview so she can prove she stayed there for at least 6 months prior to his death, seeing as they know she was there I dont have a clue why all this needs to be done, she has herself in a tizz about it all, hopefully we can get it all sorted out tomorrow and thats it over with. Need to call the DVLA as well, I need a replacement tax disk, i couldnt be bothered to put it in the holder I have as you need a screwdriver so used to leave it on the dash but it blew out the window while I was driving today! That will teach me to be lazy I suppose, also need to call the council uplift services, I had then come to lift rubbish from my garden, (my old mattress, some surniture and 9bags of broken toys & general junk!) they lifted most of it but left all the bags so need to call them get them to come back out & lift the stuff, they better not try say its my 2nd uplift of the year as it should have been lifted with the other stuff its not my fault they messed it up!
I was SO tired today, Id went to bed at midnight thinking I would get a decent sleep ready to get up early take Brogan to school, oh how wrong was I? Violet decided to wake at 3.30am till 4.30am then 5am till 6am, I then had to get up at 7.30am to get Brogan ready for school, could have cried when the alarm went off, it also woke little madam up as well! Just glad she later went to sleep for 2 hours so I managed to sleep then, so much for starting to catch up on my housework!
Brogan had her hearing test today, it went ok, she passed the test with some hearing loss at low frequencies but that (in theory) shouldn't effect her hearing at speach levels as they were ok, her ears were clear of fluid and wax as well, she didnt seem to rely to heavily on word recognition patterns when being spoke to either, looks like she needs to start to listen more than anything else. She sis say that somedays she an hear fine where others she finds it hard so we have to go back in a few months time to get checked over again. She likes to keep me on my toes with her hearing, she done the samething when she was a baby, passed her newborn hearing screening but failed her hearing test at her 6 week check so had to go back and forth then to audiology appointments, they came back fine then as well, she just likes to ignore people I think!!!!
Me and Brogan done some shopping before we headed home, once in I quickly put the shopping away while instructing her to change into her dance uniform as she has dance class on a Monday evening which starts at 4.45pm, took us ages to drive there as there is stupid roadworks, she got dropped off, then I went home to make dinner before I had to pick her up again at 6.30pm. When we were eating dinner I put some brocolli and cauliflower on Violet's highchair for her to try, she never even attempted to pick it up to eat but played with the blue bowl, apparently it was more interesting, I did put a few pieces in her mouth to see how she got on, seemed to like the brocolli but kept spitting the cauliflower out as soon as I put it in her mouth, dont blame her I dont really like it either, only eat it as it good for you (& helps to my 1 of 5 per day which I rarely manage to get to!) As much as she watches everything you eat & puts loads in her mouth (the socks went in at dinner time, haven't a clue how she got it off, into her hand & up to her mouth while in her highchair, a wee mini houldini I think!) she isn't ready yet to be weaned. She is 18weeks and 4 days today so still plenty of time yet to wean her, she was sort of sleeping through (until the past 2 nights) and is happy on her milk so leaving her just now for a while longer, might let her try little bits every so often so I can judge when she ready.
Got a lot to do tomorrow morning, need to take my gran to the local housing office, her & my grandad live in a council house, the tenancy was under his name so since he has died it needs to be transfered to her name now, loads of stupid forms and now this interview so she can prove she stayed there for at least 6 months prior to his death, seeing as they know she was there I dont have a clue why all this needs to be done, she has herself in a tizz about it all, hopefully we can get it all sorted out tomorrow and thats it over with. Need to call the DVLA as well, I need a replacement tax disk, i couldnt be bothered to put it in the holder I have as you need a screwdriver so used to leave it on the dash but it blew out the window while I was driving today! That will teach me to be lazy I suppose, also need to call the council uplift services, I had then come to lift rubbish from my garden, (my old mattress, some surniture and 9bags of broken toys & general junk!) they lifted most of it but left all the bags so need to call them get them to come back out & lift the stuff, they better not try say its my 2nd uplift of the year as it should have been lifted with the other stuff its not my fault they messed it up!
Sunday, 18 April 2010
A Busy Sunday
Argh, I've had a migrane all day and it wont shift! Not that it stops me having loads to do, still had to get up early, go to mass, get in the shopping, make dinner, do dishes and make sure everything ready for school's going back in tomorrow!
Life never stops when your a mum, even if you feel like crap you still need to get up and on with it. Chris did let me (try) to sleep on this morning mind you, when he gotten in from work at 6.30am Violet had just woken up and wasn't for going back to sleep so he took her to play in the living room to let me sleep on till 9am as he knew I had to get up then to go to mass. Little madam was REALLY loud though so didn't get much sleep after that, could hear her giggling and shouting at him, even though I knew she was fine doesn't mean I can just switch off.
I finally got around to asking the priest for a date for the christening, its for July 4th, wanted it to be the 25th July but he was going on holiday then and would have been a different priest, I want him to do it though as he the same priest that christened Brogan, so it means more for him to do it. Have to laugh though as he determind that he putting Bridget in as a middle name for her after my gran, its starting as a running joke now, lets hope he doesn't though or Chris will be in a right huff on her christening day. Now I just need to sort out the venue, food, dress and invitations, oh and the entertainment! It's a good job I have 10 weeks to sort it all out.
I had made ratatouille vegetables with pasta for dinner, it was yummy, was eating it with Violet sitting on my knee, she not been weaned yet but kept smacking her lips and making yumm noises so I let her try it, she seemed to really like the tomato in it the most, ate some of the aubergine and courgette as well with no problems as well and was getting excited when I was giving her little bits to try, they were really soft but not pureed down, she knew that she had to chew them before swallowing as well, my clever little chica. I don't think it will be too long before I have to start weaning her, she takes a lot of interest in your food when you eating, but she still sleeping through and happy on her milk just now so hoping to hold off a little longer, she is 18 weeks 3 days just now and at 17 weeks 5 days weighted 15lb 10oz, not far off doubling her birth weight, hopefully she can hold off until then. I find it strange her not being on solids yet though as Brogan was on them at 11 weeks 4 days, she had to have it then as was taking far too much milk, 8 bottles of 8oz hungry baby, the health visitor and GP didnt want her to take so much as it could have stretched her tummy causing obesity problems in the future.
I managed to get both the girls into bed sleeping for 9pm tonight, result! Need to get an early night myself as tomorrow is Monday and they are always busy for me with school, I usually have uni but classes are now finished, Brogan has dance class as well, tomorrow she has her hearing test, her hearing been bad now for about 9 months, its been driving us crazy and in school its been bothering her as well, hopefully it nothin too serious, will find out tomorrow.
Life never stops when your a mum, even if you feel like crap you still need to get up and on with it. Chris did let me (try) to sleep on this morning mind you, when he gotten in from work at 6.30am Violet had just woken up and wasn't for going back to sleep so he took her to play in the living room to let me sleep on till 9am as he knew I had to get up then to go to mass. Little madam was REALLY loud though so didn't get much sleep after that, could hear her giggling and shouting at him, even though I knew she was fine doesn't mean I can just switch off.
I finally got around to asking the priest for a date for the christening, its for July 4th, wanted it to be the 25th July but he was going on holiday then and would have been a different priest, I want him to do it though as he the same priest that christened Brogan, so it means more for him to do it. Have to laugh though as he determind that he putting Bridget in as a middle name for her after my gran, its starting as a running joke now, lets hope he doesn't though or Chris will be in a right huff on her christening day. Now I just need to sort out the venue, food, dress and invitations, oh and the entertainment! It's a good job I have 10 weeks to sort it all out.
I had made ratatouille vegetables with pasta for dinner, it was yummy, was eating it with Violet sitting on my knee, she not been weaned yet but kept smacking her lips and making yumm noises so I let her try it, she seemed to really like the tomato in it the most, ate some of the aubergine and courgette as well with no problems as well and was getting excited when I was giving her little bits to try, they were really soft but not pureed down, she knew that she had to chew them before swallowing as well, my clever little chica. I don't think it will be too long before I have to start weaning her, she takes a lot of interest in your food when you eating, but she still sleeping through and happy on her milk just now so hoping to hold off a little longer, she is 18 weeks 3 days just now and at 17 weeks 5 days weighted 15lb 10oz, not far off doubling her birth weight, hopefully she can hold off until then. I find it strange her not being on solids yet though as Brogan was on them at 11 weeks 4 days, she had to have it then as was taking far too much milk, 8 bottles of 8oz hungry baby, the health visitor and GP didnt want her to take so much as it could have stretched her tummy causing obesity problems in the future.
I managed to get both the girls into bed sleeping for 9pm tonight, result! Need to get an early night myself as tomorrow is Monday and they are always busy for me with school, I usually have uni but classes are now finished, Brogan has dance class as well, tomorrow she has her hearing test, her hearing been bad now for about 9 months, its been driving us crazy and in school its been bothering her as well, hopefully it nothin too serious, will find out tomorrow.
Saturday, 17 April 2010
Sorted the jungle out this weekend!
Friday was a really lovely day, finally pried the lawnmower out the cellar and decided to cut the grass, well I got the front done but it took me ages. Afterwards me and Chris took the girls to Drumpellier loch where we fed the ducks, swans and geese and walked around the loch (its just over 1 mile all around) I had put on my new shoes, what a bad idea that was! Especially as I never put any socks on with them, my heels and toes are covered in cuts and blisters and are so sore, I look like an old lady when trying to walk! Must be a glutton for punishment though as today I put them back on for a while, need to break them in somehow! Brogan stayed at my grans Friday night, gave me sometime out from the two of them. I dropped Chris off at the train station for work them when I got home got Violet off to bed, should really have went them myself as I was tired but ended up online till half 1 so been shattered most of today.
Violet had me up from 7am, I was so tired got up fed her, changed her nappy then let her play in her cot till about 10am so I could try get some more sleep, spent most of the time listening to her gibbering away to herself, I love listening to her its so cute. We got up and ready at 10am then went a lovely walk around the village with her in her sling, she loved it as could see everything, the only time she didn't was when we were back in the street heading to the house as the wind was blowing in her face. Violet was really sicky all day, she suffers from relfux so always sick bt today it was really bad, she had been playing on her gym and it went everywhere in her eyes, ears all over her hair, the poor wee soul wish I could take it away from her, soon we had to pick Brogan up from my grans after we got back I decided it was time to tackle the nightmare of my back garden!!!
Violet went for her nap, Brogan went out to play so I decided to sort out the back garden, it massive about 25m long & 8-9m wide, and totally neglected last year! Was clearing away sone dead plants from the bottom of the garden and found a tree growing, I never had a tree so dont know where it's came from, just goes to show how much I neglected it last year! I also found a dead mouse, yuck! Wouldn't have minded if it were alive but not dead, it ended up in the big pile of dead plants which I decided would be quicker to burn than clear away! Cut all the grass twice as well so it looks alot better now, just lots of dead patches will need to get lawn seed sort it out as I want it to be nice for Brogan and Violet to play in during the summer. It started to rain just as I finished so that was lucky. Violet was just getting up from her nap when I came in, I made Chris get up with her so I could lie down for an hour, not that I got piece as Violet knew I was in the next room and kept shouting and being really noisy they whole time, when he brought her into me after the hour she gave me the biggest smile and was then quiet! the little cheeky monkey, she is such a mummy's girl right now.
You would think that after I done all the garden Chris would help out with the dinner or the housework but nope I was left to do it again, getting really sick of him not helping out around the house, he leaves everything at his feet and never tidies anything up, we keep arguing over it, he keeps promising he will help, and still Im left to do it all.
So glad the spring break holidays finished and Brogan back to school on Monday, gives me sometime to sort the house out as its a mess, the house is too small and we have too much stuff it driving me crazy! Need to see if the council will give us a bigger house, cant afford to privately rent the prices are just insane, about £550 per month for a 3 bed in a nice area, we only pay £230 a month to the council so that jump is massive for us! One right now we cant afford.
Between my feet from the shoes and my back from the gardening and walk with Violet in her sling my body is aching all over! Hope it feels better tomorrow.
Violet had me up from 7am, I was so tired got up fed her, changed her nappy then let her play in her cot till about 10am so I could try get some more sleep, spent most of the time listening to her gibbering away to herself, I love listening to her its so cute. We got up and ready at 10am then went a lovely walk around the village with her in her sling, she loved it as could see everything, the only time she didn't was when we were back in the street heading to the house as the wind was blowing in her face. Violet was really sicky all day, she suffers from relfux so always sick bt today it was really bad, she had been playing on her gym and it went everywhere in her eyes, ears all over her hair, the poor wee soul wish I could take it away from her, soon we had to pick Brogan up from my grans after we got back I decided it was time to tackle the nightmare of my back garden!!!
Violet went for her nap, Brogan went out to play so I decided to sort out the back garden, it massive about 25m long & 8-9m wide, and totally neglected last year! Was clearing away sone dead plants from the bottom of the garden and found a tree growing, I never had a tree so dont know where it's came from, just goes to show how much I neglected it last year! I also found a dead mouse, yuck! Wouldn't have minded if it were alive but not dead, it ended up in the big pile of dead plants which I decided would be quicker to burn than clear away! Cut all the grass twice as well so it looks alot better now, just lots of dead patches will need to get lawn seed sort it out as I want it to be nice for Brogan and Violet to play in during the summer. It started to rain just as I finished so that was lucky. Violet was just getting up from her nap when I came in, I made Chris get up with her so I could lie down for an hour, not that I got piece as Violet knew I was in the next room and kept shouting and being really noisy they whole time, when he brought her into me after the hour she gave me the biggest smile and was then quiet! the little cheeky monkey, she is such a mummy's girl right now.
You would think that after I done all the garden Chris would help out with the dinner or the housework but nope I was left to do it again, getting really sick of him not helping out around the house, he leaves everything at his feet and never tidies anything up, we keep arguing over it, he keeps promising he will help, and still Im left to do it all.
So glad the spring break holidays finished and Brogan back to school on Monday, gives me sometime to sort the house out as its a mess, the house is too small and we have too much stuff it driving me crazy! Need to see if the council will give us a bigger house, cant afford to privately rent the prices are just insane, about £550 per month for a 3 bed in a nice area, we only pay £230 a month to the council so that jump is massive for us! One right now we cant afford.
Between my feet from the shoes and my back from the gardening and walk with Violet in her sling my body is aching all over! Hope it feels better tomorrow.
Friday, 16 April 2010
It was a nice day yesterday
We had another lovely day yesterday with the weather, glag I wasn't flying away anywhere as all planes were landed due to the Volcanic ash in the atmosphere, it was strange not to see any planes in the sky, we stay about 20miles from Glasgow Airport and there usually loads flying high over head, blue skies with no plane contrails it looks strange!
I had a really lovely evening yesterday, me & Chris took Brogan out for her dinner to pizza hut for a treat, we left the little madam with Chris' parents so we could spend sometime with just Brogan, we all had a really good time and the food was lovely. Violet seemed to have a good time with her nana & grandad too. I also got myself 2 lovely new t-shirts to wear in the nice weather.
Violet had a lovely bubbly bath with her dad then went down to bed at 10pm, she slept till 6.30am had a quick feed and slept till 10.30am this morning it was bliss, also much appreciated as me & Chris had a few Jack Daniels and watched a movie, Pelham 123, was really good and had a lovely night together. Today is another lovel day as well, wonder what to get up to today?
I had a really lovely evening yesterday, me & Chris took Brogan out for her dinner to pizza hut for a treat, we left the little madam with Chris' parents so we could spend sometime with just Brogan, we all had a really good time and the food was lovely. Violet seemed to have a good time with her nana & grandad too. I also got myself 2 lovely new t-shirts to wear in the nice weather.
Violet had a lovely bubbly bath with her dad then went down to bed at 10pm, she slept till 6.30am had a quick feed and slept till 10.30am this morning it was bliss, also much appreciated as me & Chris had a few Jack Daniels and watched a movie, Pelham 123, was really good and had a lovely night together. Today is another lovel day as well, wonder what to get up to today?
Thursday, 15 April 2010
Being induced and my birth
Well I arrived at hospital on 7th December at 1pm, by 2pm they had inserted the pessary to induce my labour, the waiting had begun and I was so excited, we both were.
Later that evening I had some slight contractions but after Chris was sent home at 9pm they stopped shortly afterwards. The next morning the doctors came round and examined me, I was 2cm, my cervix had shortened and they could send me down to a labour suite, get my waters broken and my labours started on a drip, this was at 7am, I excitedly text Chris the news and patiently sat waiting on him coming and them taking me down!
Tuesday went passed, no sign of them taking me down and no sign of baby arriving either. So I spent another day and night on the ward waiting, Chris was sent home again. On the Wednesday at 1pm they said that I could go down to the labour ward, ready for when they had a space for me in the suites, I was so xcited again, so was Chris, finally we thought this is it!
We went down the the labour ward about 2pm, there was 1 woman in labour on it already, I started to feel like a fraud for being there, if it wasnt for the bump I would have been asking why I was as I wasn't in labour. Another 3 people cam into the bay I was in, 2 were taken through t delivery, one was still there along with the woman that was there before me.
That night after still not taking me through I saif I wanted to go home, the midwife and doctor on duty managed to bribe me to stay, I got my own private room, Chris could stay the night and didn't need to leave me and I was promised they would take me through for 6am to get started off. They put me in my room, gave us both tea & toast and done a trace on me, we decided to go to sleep about 11pm as we knew the next day we were both going to need it.
Chris feel asleep pretty much straight away but I couldnt fall over, at about 1am I realised I was having mild contractions about 20mins apart, I left Chris sleeping, never said to the midwifes either. At 2.45am I woke Chris up, told him I was in labour, he didn't believe me at first, till I had my next one!
I got him to ask the midwives to run me a bath just after 3am, I spent about half an hour in it, when we got back to the room my contractions were now about 10mins apart, this was at3.40am(ish) I asked Chris to get the midwives to come so they could see how far along I was. By the time they came a few mins later my contractions had decided to come quicker and were now every 4-5mins, the midwife came in I asked her to check me, she sort of tutted and looked at me as if I were over reacting, not that I was complaining about the pain but she didnt see the point as the contractions hadn't started that long before. She went away to get gloves and the other midwife came back, the on which had presuaded me to stay (it was a good job she did!) I had a massive bloody show in the toilet waiting on her which freeked me out a little, when she checked me I was 8cm and my waters were bulging! The look on the other midwives face was a picture!
I walked round to the delivery suite, we got to the room about 4am, I got up on the bed and they put a monitor on me, I decided to take some gas and air, my contrctions were 2-3mins apart now and although I didn't really need the gas and air it helped me focus my breathing. Chris was shocked at how quickly things were progressing, he thought we had hours to go. At 4.15am my waters broke, they were meconium stained so I paniced slightly as I knew that could be bad for the baby. I started to push just after that, 2 puches and her head was delivered, I never even realised her head was out and when the midwife was talking to her saying the rest of you will be out in a minute to meet mummy & daddy I asked how is the head out? She gave me a little giggle, in the next push she was born, as beautiful as ever at 4.22am. Luckily I never even had as much as a graze never mind a cut.
My total recorded labour was 1 hour 20 mins, had I have went home she would have been born in the house, we are a 20 minute drive from the hospital but would have had to have waited on Chris's dad picking us up, he a 15 min drive away as my contractions weren't sore enough for me to want to go to hospital till 4am, his dad would have probably arrived as she was being born! I think the time on my recorded labour is too long I would say established labour only lasted about 40mins but they timed it from when I asked for a bath, I only wanted that as my back was sore!
The aftercare in the hospital was terrible so I left that night, would rather be at home in my own bed, surrounded by my own things, sharing our first night together as a family.
Later that evening I had some slight contractions but after Chris was sent home at 9pm they stopped shortly afterwards. The next morning the doctors came round and examined me, I was 2cm, my cervix had shortened and they could send me down to a labour suite, get my waters broken and my labours started on a drip, this was at 7am, I excitedly text Chris the news and patiently sat waiting on him coming and them taking me down!
Tuesday went passed, no sign of them taking me down and no sign of baby arriving either. So I spent another day and night on the ward waiting, Chris was sent home again. On the Wednesday at 1pm they said that I could go down to the labour ward, ready for when they had a space for me in the suites, I was so xcited again, so was Chris, finally we thought this is it!
We went down the the labour ward about 2pm, there was 1 woman in labour on it already, I started to feel like a fraud for being there, if it wasnt for the bump I would have been asking why I was as I wasn't in labour. Another 3 people cam into the bay I was in, 2 were taken through t delivery, one was still there along with the woman that was there before me.
That night after still not taking me through I saif I wanted to go home, the midwife and doctor on duty managed to bribe me to stay, I got my own private room, Chris could stay the night and didn't need to leave me and I was promised they would take me through for 6am to get started off. They put me in my room, gave us both tea & toast and done a trace on me, we decided to go to sleep about 11pm as we knew the next day we were both going to need it.
Chris feel asleep pretty much straight away but I couldnt fall over, at about 1am I realised I was having mild contractions about 20mins apart, I left Chris sleeping, never said to the midwifes either. At 2.45am I woke Chris up, told him I was in labour, he didn't believe me at first, till I had my next one!
I got him to ask the midwives to run me a bath just after 3am, I spent about half an hour in it, when we got back to the room my contractions were now about 10mins apart, this was at3.40am(ish) I asked Chris to get the midwives to come so they could see how far along I was. By the time they came a few mins later my contractions had decided to come quicker and were now every 4-5mins, the midwife came in I asked her to check me, she sort of tutted and looked at me as if I were over reacting, not that I was complaining about the pain but she didnt see the point as the contractions hadn't started that long before. She went away to get gloves and the other midwife came back, the on which had presuaded me to stay (it was a good job she did!) I had a massive bloody show in the toilet waiting on her which freeked me out a little, when she checked me I was 8cm and my waters were bulging! The look on the other midwives face was a picture!
I walked round to the delivery suite, we got to the room about 4am, I got up on the bed and they put a monitor on me, I decided to take some gas and air, my contrctions were 2-3mins apart now and although I didn't really need the gas and air it helped me focus my breathing. Chris was shocked at how quickly things were progressing, he thought we had hours to go. At 4.15am my waters broke, they were meconium stained so I paniced slightly as I knew that could be bad for the baby. I started to push just after that, 2 puches and her head was delivered, I never even realised her head was out and when the midwife was talking to her saying the rest of you will be out in a minute to meet mummy & daddy I asked how is the head out? She gave me a little giggle, in the next push she was born, as beautiful as ever at 4.22am. Luckily I never even had as much as a graze never mind a cut.
My total recorded labour was 1 hour 20 mins, had I have went home she would have been born in the house, we are a 20 minute drive from the hospital but would have had to have waited on Chris's dad picking us up, he a 15 min drive away as my contractions weren't sore enough for me to want to go to hospital till 4am, his dad would have probably arrived as she was being born! I think the time on my recorded labour is too long I would say established labour only lasted about 40mins but they timed it from when I asked for a bath, I only wanted that as my back was sore!
The aftercare in the hospital was terrible so I left that night, would rather be at home in my own bed, surrounded by my own things, sharing our first night together as a family.
My Pregnancy
I found out on 27th March I was expecting, had it confirmed on 30th March with the GP and started the ball rolling for midwife appointments, had my first one on the 1st April, some information and was told I would get my appointment in soon for my scan and booking appointment.
We thought that we were further on than we were and were thinking early to mid November the baby would be due (how wrong were we going to be!), we told our families we were expecting in the first week on May, had no choice as I was killed with morning sickness and was starting to show already! My family were all fine but Chris' family were all shocked and not happy to begin with because he was only 20, they soon came around though.
We had our booking appointment and first scan on 12th May 2009, there we saw our wee bean for the 1st time, it was all so exciting, I was 10 weeks gone, due 28th November and had to go for another scan in 2 weeks to check growth and measurements as it was too early for some of them in that scan, as Id had surgery while I was pregnant they offered me a 20 week anomily scan as well, they not done routinely in my area, you usually only get your dating scan.
The next scan came, our wee bean was doing well, I still had horrendus morning sickness. The 20 week scan went well, we didnt find out the sex wanted to keep it a surprise. At the end of July/ begining of August my grandad had been taken into hospital to get tests done as he couldn't swallow, when the results came back it wasnt good news, he had Lung Cancer.
We had already had bad news with my aunt dying on 2nd August, was starting to think my pregnancy was cursed to have bad things happen to others while I was pregnant with this news and the death of my step brother at the begining. My preganancy progressed well, my grandad started treatment after his holiday to Blackpool.
There were more deaths in my family, another aunt and an uncle died as well.
My pregnancy was not too bad after the moring sickness subsided at about 15 weeks, I developed SPD in the latter stages and had constant heartburn, I also had carpel tunnel syndrom in my wrists. I bloomed, well I looked like Id swallowed a baby elephant! My due date came and went.
On 1st December I went to my antenatal appointment, they were going to do a sweep of my membranes but my baby who had been fully engaged since 30 weeks decided to 'pop' back out and was no longer engaged anymore so the midwife wouldn't perform it. She got a consultant to check me, I was 1cm dilated but still 3cm long, they wanted to leave me till the following week to check my again then before organising a date for induction on the 11th December, I told them my family situation and they decided to bring me in on 7th December if I hadn't had baby by then to induce me.
My grandad started more treatment on the 7th December, he hadn't responded to the chemo and radiotherapy he already had even though it was the maximum dose possible, so as he went in for more treatment I drove myself to hospital to be induced, I thought it would be quick and Id be home by Wednesday with my baby at the latest, I would be proven wrong again!
We thought that we were further on than we were and were thinking early to mid November the baby would be due (how wrong were we going to be!), we told our families we were expecting in the first week on May, had no choice as I was killed with morning sickness and was starting to show already! My family were all fine but Chris' family were all shocked and not happy to begin with because he was only 20, they soon came around though.
We had our booking appointment and first scan on 12th May 2009, there we saw our wee bean for the 1st time, it was all so exciting, I was 10 weeks gone, due 28th November and had to go for another scan in 2 weeks to check growth and measurements as it was too early for some of them in that scan, as Id had surgery while I was pregnant they offered me a 20 week anomily scan as well, they not done routinely in my area, you usually only get your dating scan.
The next scan came, our wee bean was doing well, I still had horrendus morning sickness. The 20 week scan went well, we didnt find out the sex wanted to keep it a surprise. At the end of July/ begining of August my grandad had been taken into hospital to get tests done as he couldn't swallow, when the results came back it wasnt good news, he had Lung Cancer.
We had already had bad news with my aunt dying on 2nd August, was starting to think my pregnancy was cursed to have bad things happen to others while I was pregnant with this news and the death of my step brother at the begining. My preganancy progressed well, my grandad started treatment after his holiday to Blackpool.
There were more deaths in my family, another aunt and an uncle died as well.
My pregnancy was not too bad after the moring sickness subsided at about 15 weeks, I developed SPD in the latter stages and had constant heartburn, I also had carpel tunnel syndrom in my wrists. I bloomed, well I looked like Id swallowed a baby elephant! My due date came and went.
On 1st December I went to my antenatal appointment, they were going to do a sweep of my membranes but my baby who had been fully engaged since 30 weeks decided to 'pop' back out and was no longer engaged anymore so the midwife wouldn't perform it. She got a consultant to check me, I was 1cm dilated but still 3cm long, they wanted to leave me till the following week to check my again then before organising a date for induction on the 11th December, I told them my family situation and they decided to bring me in on 7th December if I hadn't had baby by then to induce me.
My grandad started more treatment on the 7th December, he hadn't responded to the chemo and radiotherapy he already had even though it was the maximum dose possible, so as he went in for more treatment I drove myself to hospital to be induced, I thought it would be quick and Id be home by Wednesday with my baby at the latest, I would be proven wrong again!
So ANGRY at him, cant believe what he done!
I couldn't write this yesterday as I was so angry at him at least today I can write it down without wanting to explode!!!
Had a bad nights sleep, Violet decided to wake up and blow raspberries at 5.30am, just as Chris was comming home from work. I had to go to my aunts funeral later that morning so he had gotten a taxi straight home so he could get a few hours sleep before I left him with the 2 girls. Well she didnt want to go back to sleep, at about 6.30am she was wanting fed so I got her up and gave her a breastfeed, she then wanted some of her bottle. I put her back down in her cot and gave her her dummy, she was starting to settle but wanted my hand next to her face, she likes to cuddle into it while falling over so I stood by the cot holding her face, the next minute Chris is accusing me of trying to smoother her having my hand over her mouth! WTF! I was so pissed he could even think I could do such a thing so we had a major argument, I finally got Violet resettled to sleep about 7.30am, he then went to sleep and I started to get ready for the funeral.
I didnt want to go, I felt it too soon since my grandads funeral so had been upset all night thinking about him and going to the funeral, what I needed lastnight was someone to cuddle tell me it would be okay, not someone to accuse me of trying to hurt my baby! Anyways I got ready and woke him when I was leaving at 9.40am, I also said for him to feed Brogan.
I went to the funeral, it was really sad and I found it so hard to be there. I done a few bits of shopping after it and got home at 2pm. Brogan was out playing in the street, in the house he was asleep in bed, didn't look like he had moved in the slightest, Violet was in her cot and I could tell she needed changed as soon as I went into the room as it was stinking of poo! I put the shopping bags in the kitchen and checked the bottles, NOT ONE had been touched! Brogan came in then and told me that Violet had been crying earlier on but she didn't know how to make a bottle for her and Chris wouldn't get up to see to her and hadn't given her breakfast either.
I cannot believe he totally neglected the two of them while he slept, I got Violet changed and fed and made something for Brogan to eat, I then took the girls out a walk by the cannal, was a lovely day outside and I knew there was going to be an argument when I got home so wanted out for a while to try calm down.
His excuse was he was asleep as he had been working hard and never heard her, no offence but im alwas tired, I work hard everyday bringing up the girls and sorting out the house without any thanks and I can still watch them I would never EVER leave them hungry and dirty. He has tried to make it up the rest of the night but it going to take a long time till I ever trust him to watch them again after he done that. Words fail to explain how pissed off at him I am!
Had a bad nights sleep, Violet decided to wake up and blow raspberries at 5.30am, just as Chris was comming home from work. I had to go to my aunts funeral later that morning so he had gotten a taxi straight home so he could get a few hours sleep before I left him with the 2 girls. Well she didnt want to go back to sleep, at about 6.30am she was wanting fed so I got her up and gave her a breastfeed, she then wanted some of her bottle. I put her back down in her cot and gave her her dummy, she was starting to settle but wanted my hand next to her face, she likes to cuddle into it while falling over so I stood by the cot holding her face, the next minute Chris is accusing me of trying to smoother her having my hand over her mouth! WTF! I was so pissed he could even think I could do such a thing so we had a major argument, I finally got Violet resettled to sleep about 7.30am, he then went to sleep and I started to get ready for the funeral.
I didnt want to go, I felt it too soon since my grandads funeral so had been upset all night thinking about him and going to the funeral, what I needed lastnight was someone to cuddle tell me it would be okay, not someone to accuse me of trying to hurt my baby! Anyways I got ready and woke him when I was leaving at 9.40am, I also said for him to feed Brogan.
I went to the funeral, it was really sad and I found it so hard to be there. I done a few bits of shopping after it and got home at 2pm. Brogan was out playing in the street, in the house he was asleep in bed, didn't look like he had moved in the slightest, Violet was in her cot and I could tell she needed changed as soon as I went into the room as it was stinking of poo! I put the shopping bags in the kitchen and checked the bottles, NOT ONE had been touched! Brogan came in then and told me that Violet had been crying earlier on but she didn't know how to make a bottle for her and Chris wouldn't get up to see to her and hadn't given her breakfast either.
I cannot believe he totally neglected the two of them while he slept, I got Violet changed and fed and made something for Brogan to eat, I then took the girls out a walk by the cannal, was a lovely day outside and I knew there was going to be an argument when I got home so wanted out for a while to try calm down.
His excuse was he was asleep as he had been working hard and never heard her, no offence but im alwas tired, I work hard everyday bringing up the girls and sorting out the house without any thanks and I can still watch them I would never EVER leave them hungry and dirty. He has tried to make it up the rest of the night but it going to take a long time till I ever trust him to watch them again after he done that. Words fail to explain how pissed off at him I am!
Wednesday, 14 April 2010
Findding out I was expecting again
March 2009 was an eventful month, some memories I want to keep forever, others I wish they never happened.
At the begining of March I finished up working as a GP's Receptionist, my contract had ended and I was going in for surgery soon, I had been waiting for this surgery for 3 1/2 years, I was going in for a breast reduction and I was so excited and couldn't wait.
I was admitted to hospital on 12th March and on Friday the 13th March I had my reduction, my breast were made smaller from a 32J to a more manageable and nicer 34C/D. I had 1kg of tissue removed from each side. I had bleeding problems during my surgery and became really anaemic so a week later when my period didn't arrive I never thought anything of it. On Thursday 26th March 2009, my step-brother was rushed to hospital in cardiac arrest after experimenting with drugs and overdosing, I went to visit him on the Friday 27th March, he was still alive but in a comma and the doctors were performing tests on him, it was the last time I was to ever see him alive, the following day the tests reveiled that he was brain dead, he left this world aged 23 on Sunday 29th March 2009.
After I had visited Sean in the hospital on the Friday night, me and Chris went to tesco to pick up a few things, my period was now 6 days late so I picked up a test, still never thought there was any chance I was pregnant and that it wasn't here due to the blood I lost during surgery and because I was anaemic. When we got home I decided to do the test, joking to Chris that I would have his privates if it were positive!
Well, the test was positive, I could barely speak and we left the shopping sitting to buy more tests and check. The next test didnt work so later that night with the third test stick in hand I done another, there was no not beliving it this time, it was there in black and white, PREGNANT 3+WEEKS!!!
To say I was shocked was an understatement, it took me ages to get my head around it, Chris seemed to accept it quicker than me, my head was all over the place at the time due to what was going on with Sean, at the moment the test proved positive I knew then that he wasnt going to make it as well.
I was not recoverying from major surgery, grieving my dead step-brother and dealing with the fact I was having another baby! If that was only 1 month what would the next 9 months have in store!!!!
At the begining of March I finished up working as a GP's Receptionist, my contract had ended and I was going in for surgery soon, I had been waiting for this surgery for 3 1/2 years, I was going in for a breast reduction and I was so excited and couldn't wait.
I was admitted to hospital on 12th March and on Friday the 13th March I had my reduction, my breast were made smaller from a 32J to a more manageable and nicer 34C/D. I had 1kg of tissue removed from each side. I had bleeding problems during my surgery and became really anaemic so a week later when my period didn't arrive I never thought anything of it. On Thursday 26th March 2009, my step-brother was rushed to hospital in cardiac arrest after experimenting with drugs and overdosing, I went to visit him on the Friday 27th March, he was still alive but in a comma and the doctors were performing tests on him, it was the last time I was to ever see him alive, the following day the tests reveiled that he was brain dead, he left this world aged 23 on Sunday 29th March 2009.
After I had visited Sean in the hospital on the Friday night, me and Chris went to tesco to pick up a few things, my period was now 6 days late so I picked up a test, still never thought there was any chance I was pregnant and that it wasn't here due to the blood I lost during surgery and because I was anaemic. When we got home I decided to do the test, joking to Chris that I would have his privates if it were positive!
Well, the test was positive, I could barely speak and we left the shopping sitting to buy more tests and check. The next test didnt work so later that night with the third test stick in hand I done another, there was no not beliving it this time, it was there in black and white, PREGNANT 3+WEEKS!!!
To say I was shocked was an understatement, it took me ages to get my head around it, Chris seemed to accept it quicker than me, my head was all over the place at the time due to what was going on with Sean, at the moment the test proved positive I knew then that he wasnt going to make it as well.
I was not recoverying from major surgery, grieving my dead step-brother and dealing with the fact I was having another baby! If that was only 1 month what would the next 9 months have in store!!!!
Tuesday, 13 April 2010
Some Background Info
I am a mum, that for the rest of time is my job!
I have 2 beautiful girls, Brogan Sian who is 7 years old & my new addition Violet Hope who is 4 months. I had my first daughter at 17 to an older (yet immature) man who I refer to as sperm donor! We werent really in a relationship, infact he was engaged to someone else, so when I found out I was expecting shocked was my main reaction. Unsurprisingly he never stuck around, he never has or will have anything to do in her like, I prefare it that way.
My pregnancy with her went well and 2 days late on 12th December 2002 she was born at 6.11am weighting 8lb 7oz, my life as a mum had begun. . .
Life went passed quickly with a baby to look after, I forgot about me and ended up in a spiral of postnatal depression and self-harming. During this time I was in a relationship, which looking back now was wrong to be in. I went to college when Brogan was 8 months to study my HND in Biomedical Science, when she was 20 months and I was in my 2nd year she started nursery & thived in there my proper little madam. In the October 2004 I broke up with my (now) ex, i was finally starting to see the light at the end of a dark PND tunnel and realised we were no lnger good for each other, a few weeks after our split he was back with his ex, now when I think back im pretty sure they were seeing each other before we split.
Fast forward a few years, a house move and lots of smiles and tear in between and I decided to got back to uni and finish my degree, as I hadn't been studying for 3 years I decided to repeat my 2nd year so in September 2007 I went to (what is now) UWS in Hamilton to Study Applied Bioscience with Biotechnology, it was here I met my soulmate Chris, we were in the same class and quickly became friends. As our friendship grew so did my feelings for him and on 18th January 2008 we went on our official 1st date after our last exam and have been a couple ever since. Our life together was great and he got on famtastic with Brogan, she liked him loads as well.
On Friday 27th March 2009 our lives changed when 2 blue lines appeared on a test stick, we were now expecting our own little bundle of fun, no the best time for it to happen but thats a whole other blog, I grew massive throughout my pregnancy and 12 days late on 10th December 2009 at 4.22am Violet Hope arrived in the world weighting in at 8lb 9oz. The rounds of nappies, feeds, babysick and sleepless nights had begun again. . .
I have 2 beautiful girls, Brogan Sian who is 7 years old & my new addition Violet Hope who is 4 months. I had my first daughter at 17 to an older (yet immature) man who I refer to as sperm donor! We werent really in a relationship, infact he was engaged to someone else, so when I found out I was expecting shocked was my main reaction. Unsurprisingly he never stuck around, he never has or will have anything to do in her like, I prefare it that way.
My pregnancy with her went well and 2 days late on 12th December 2002 she was born at 6.11am weighting 8lb 7oz, my life as a mum had begun. . .
Life went passed quickly with a baby to look after, I forgot about me and ended up in a spiral of postnatal depression and self-harming. During this time I was in a relationship, which looking back now was wrong to be in. I went to college when Brogan was 8 months to study my HND in Biomedical Science, when she was 20 months and I was in my 2nd year she started nursery & thived in there my proper little madam. In the October 2004 I broke up with my (now) ex, i was finally starting to see the light at the end of a dark PND tunnel and realised we were no lnger good for each other, a few weeks after our split he was back with his ex, now when I think back im pretty sure they were seeing each other before we split.
Fast forward a few years, a house move and lots of smiles and tear in between and I decided to got back to uni and finish my degree, as I hadn't been studying for 3 years I decided to repeat my 2nd year so in September 2007 I went to (what is now) UWS in Hamilton to Study Applied Bioscience with Biotechnology, it was here I met my soulmate Chris, we were in the same class and quickly became friends. As our friendship grew so did my feelings for him and on 18th January 2008 we went on our official 1st date after our last exam and have been a couple ever since. Our life together was great and he got on famtastic with Brogan, she liked him loads as well.
On Friday 27th March 2009 our lives changed when 2 blue lines appeared on a test stick, we were now expecting our own little bundle of fun, no the best time for it to happen but thats a whole other blog, I grew massive throughout my pregnancy and 12 days late on 10th December 2009 at 4.22am Violet Hope arrived in the world weighting in at 8lb 9oz. The rounds of nappies, feeds, babysick and sleepless nights had begun again. . .
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